"Woah, check out Steven Tyler's hat!"
I will never forget the first time I saw a launch on Rock 'n' Roller Coaster. It was 2000 -- just a month before Aerosmith was in the Super Bowl half time show -- the ride was a massive part of the advertising campaign around Walt Disney World, and I didn't fully know what to expect.
The timing was perfect: the doors from the preshow opened right in front of me, at the exact moment a screaming limousine of people went careening into the darkness from a standstill. That is seared into my brain like few memories in the parks.
First, it must be acknowledged that I am an unabashed Aerosmith fan. Their music was part of the soundtrack of my high school and college years, and setting a ride to it will definitely give it a place in my heart.
Even if it is a weird fit! Rock 'n' Roller Coaster represents a strange moment in time for the parks. The studio fits aesthetically on Sunset Boulevard, but the details around it are quite bizarre anachronism. It's tucked away around a corner and through a gate, almost like they knew that, and just hoped we wouldn't notice.
It is neither a completely original piece of Disney parks fantasy, nor a representation of Disney IP. It is an off-the-shelf rollercoaster featuring an old -- and fairly adult-oriented! -- rock band (though about to be very relevant in radio play with the release of Just Push Play). When you really think about it, more than maybe any other attraction in any other park, Rock 'n' is a case of: "why are you here again?"
But also, it works, and it's fun. They actually took some effort to build a theme around that off-the-shelf coaster, and it's hilarious in its attempt, while also somehow successful. That alley where I first watched that launch is a particularly interest piece of place-making, with a lot of detail to look at as you stare through a chain-link fence. A speeding stretch limo is certainly a good use of the train, and "rushing to make a concert" is just enough story to lower a harness for.
Turns out, the way you make a fairly simple coaster fun is by putting it in the dark with a bunch of neon lights. The inversions are neat, but the complete lack of foreshadowing from the pitch-black surroundings keeps you from really being able to brace yourself, even subconsciously. The glowing road signs make for a cool aesthetic that breaks up the total darkness.
Then there's the soundtrack. At the point I first experienced it, the idea of onboard roller coaster audio was mind blowing, to say nothing of it being a band I loved. On board audio is quaint now, but a lot of coasters still don't bother to arrange the music to match the ride as perfectly as Rock 'n' does. Sweet Emotion is probably the best; not my favorite Aerosmith song by a longshot, but somehow perfect for the twists and turns of the coaster. Love in an Elevator is a close second, and that run ends with Walk This Way, as a bonus.
The real reason this ride sits on this list (besides some band bias), though, is that first thing I talked about: that launch. The physical sensation that launch gives you, going 0-60 in 2.8 seconds, into the dark, straight into an inversion, with blues rock blasting in your ears is nearly unmatched anywhere at Walt Disney World. In fact, the only two physical thrills I can think of that surpass it will be coming much later on this list.
Were there another launch with a more themed ride, then maybe Rock 'n' wouldn't be on the list. The fact is, the first 5 seconds of this ride are a thrill like nothing else on property, and something I want to do any time I'm in Hollywood Studios, at least once. There are plenty of rides with better theming, that were more important for the industry coming up, but if there something I will never get sick of and want to do any time I visit, it's going to get included.
But also, hearing Pink in the middle of a Disney park is kind of weird.
"Chris, can you grab my black Les Paul?"
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