At this point, you can safely surmise this list will be entirely Fantasyland dark rides that geographically replaced beloved classics.
I remember in 2006, my father got The Little Mermaid on DVD. Fresh off a Walt Disney World College Program, with Disney stuff on the brain, I pulled out the DVD on Christmas break to watch Ariel for the first time in a whole lot of years.
As with any DVD, though, what I actually did was go to the bonus features first. In that section, there was something I didn't expect: a mock-up of a ride through of a Fantasyland-style dark ride based on Mermaid that was designed in the early 90s and never built.
It immediately inserted itself rent-free into the living space of my brain. I'm not the world's biggest Little Mermaid fan, but it's a perfect storyline and setting for a dark ride. The one you could find on the DVD had a couple of nifty elements you don't see in the realized ride ranked here; wholly justifiable, but they do look need. I'm a sucker for neon and the use of neon shapes to convey the surface of water is cool. Also, the dark and spooky Ursula showdown with plenty of lightning is exciting.
So when the ideas for "New Fantasyland" popped up and there was a Little Mermaid ride in it, my brain immediately shot to this bonus feature with excitement. A new dark ride in Fantasyland! Without replacing an old one! That thing from the DVD is being dusted off!
The resulting ride was a little different, but as the first major new attraction in the Magic Kingdom in a very long time, it was my first exposure to a now-prevalent phenomenon from a lot of fans, including many I'm close to: the disappointment of any ride that isn't The Next Big Thing. Often, if feels like we are no longer accepting of C, or even D tickets; it's E or nothing. Sometimes it even feels like it's F or nothing. Because of that, it often seems like Under the Sea doesn't get appreciated because it's not Splash Mountain.
And it is definitely not Splash! It may surprise you to know Splash Mountain will be appearing (much) higher on this list, and I apologize for spoilers, but I will go to my grave trying to convince you smaller attractions that fill out capacity, are reliable, and add more approachable family experiences are a still a positive to the park. If all you ever do is worry about elaborate main courses, you're missing out on a full and balanced meal.
(The irony here is my best friend constantly calling me out for not making sides when I make dinner. Do as I say, not as I do.)
Under the Sea is a perfectly wonderful attraction for five big reasons I want to talk about, and not being the Fantasyland version of Radiator Springs Racers doesn't stop any of these from being true, positive additions to the Magic Kingdom.
First off, it's an omnimover, and omnimovers get bonus points in this blog. You can probably assume you'll see more. For those here who are not part of the initiated, omnimovers are a continually-moving attraction where every vehicle is connected in one long chain. They are tremendous because they are reliable, and they move people into the attraction very quickly. If there are only two people in a vehicle, but a vehicle dispatches from the load station every three seconds, the line is going to move very fast. The positive impact on the park from the addition of a "people eater" ride system like an omnimover cannot be overstated. If you read Jason Surrell's The Haunted Mansion: Imagineering a Disney Classic, you'll find conversation in there about the Imagineers of the 1960s realizing they needed to create attractions that helped absorb the people in the mark and shorten wait times, and that's where the design of an attraction that might end up also being on this list came from. They learned it was important then, and it remains important now. Under the Sea helps the park as a whole.
The omnimover also allows you to control the guest's point of view, like the show scene is the set, the vehicle is the camera, and their eyes are the lenses. That allows you to appreciate the other thing that gets Under the Sea on this list against some very stiff competition: the absolutely stunning scene based on the song the ride is named for. Disney fans obviously love our animatronics and dark rides, and there have been very few show cases with quite as much large-scale vibrancy of shape, color, and kinetics as the under the sea scene. Not every ride can have fully realized 3D spaces, but they should be appreciated when they exist, and this one is huge. Also, look at that animatronic, and look at how the "skin" has no seems like you would see on an older dark ride. There are little touches that let you know that, while this is built in a classic tradition -- and it's cool that it is! -- they've also picked up some tricks along the way.
The next two items on the agenda don't need a ton of time, but I want to establish that they are important, and will be a part of what gets attractions considered as belonging on this list. They go hand-in-hand as well.
The addition of the rocks and the water work of Under the Sea's exterior was a huge addition to the feel of Fantasyland. Water elements break up the concrete and other heard surfaces to add an element that feels natural and real, instills a feeling of coolness, and creates easy kinetics. Water falls and rivers and ponds are fun, and you can never have too many. Coupled with the rock work and "wood" creating different shapes, sight lines, and visual levels, there's a natural feeling of adventure and and being in a fantastical place created.
That leads to a very fun and elaborate queue that feels almost like going through something from Tom Sawyer's Island while standing in line. Multiple different elements to keep it fresh, with caves to walk through, bridges to climb across, and a transition from a cove outside to the lower foundations of a castle to also reinforce place and show in a way that doesn't insist on being noticed. Yes, it is a big, elaborate queue for a ride where the line moves pretty fast and the result is -- as established -- not a "mountain," but I'm not taking off points for being a good queue.
I said five big reasons, and the fifth is how cool the transition under water is. I don't have much to say about it, it's just awfully neat.
Oh, also, this is 100% personal, but the "Kiss the Girl" scene is exactly how I imagined using the lightning bugs and willows in a dark ride would look, and that's also neat.
So, yes, this is a whole lot of words on another Fantasyland dark ride. But it's a Fantasyland dark ride I dearly love, even without being a huge fan of its source material. I want to ride it any time I go to the park it resides in, and that means it's a net win for existing. I also just really like eels and think they're cool.
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