Never let it be said there's anything wrong with a good flat ride. It has a small foot print, adds kinetic sound and charm to the surrounding park, is a staple small-scale thrill of the industry, and a few of them are genuinely fun and iconic.
So, here is an ode to the C Ticket, something no good Disney park can do without (except apparently EPCOT [maybe?]). Many of these won't appear on this list due to how many D and E legends have been built, but that doesn't mean these aren't great and important, too.
The Mad Tea Party probably ranks as one of the most iconic theme park attractions ever built (though really because of Disneyland). The wild spins are a cliché all their own, but the vibrancy of color and music adds a lot of great character to Fantasyland in Florida.
Staying with Fantasyland classics, simple though in may be, I will never get sick of the sounds of, or the occasional ride on, the carousel. Then, used in every Walt Disney World ad since the dawn of time, Dumbo the Flying Elephant. The granddaddy of the wide array of Disney spinner attractions, the modern version is a huge plus with colorful fountains at night, and a doubled capacity.
!["Or as my friend Genie likes to say: '[Español Intensifies]!'"](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/67dd5b_fec0f2c08be34edcaa3af7194b586de4~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_900,h_506,al_c,q_85,enc_auto/67dd5b_fec0f2c08be34edcaa3af7194b586de4~mv2.jpg)
Speaking of spinners, at night Astro Orbiter is a transcendent experience worth doing at least once. The height makes it feel so much faster than it is, and it gives a one-of-a-kind view of the lights of the Magic Kingdom. Meanwhile, my friend will kill me if I don't mention that, over in Adventureland, there is also the Magic Carpets of Aladdin. It exists. The music is nice.
For all of the wonderful flat rides across the parks across the years, though, I will die on this hill: the king of the C Tickets is Mater's Junkyard Jamboree.
That attraction marks one of the most pleasant surprises I've ever gotten in a theme park. I walked into it with my wife without a single idea of what it was, and no line at all. Looking at my phone, I missed the ride cycle before us. She realized this and asked, "you didn't see that at all?" I said no, and she said, "oh. This is gonna be great."
That was essentially our honeymoon, and remains one of our fondest memories together. Also, she was right. Cracking the whip along a figure eight, being thrown left and right, while constantly under the illusion you will be hitting the next vehicle is an absolute blast, far outweighing the geographical space it occupies.
I've now spent an entire article talking about attractions that are not the headline. That's simply because, important though they are, C Tickets have about as much words to say about them as they have yards of real estate. They're simple. Simple is good. In honesty, this just felt like a good occasion to celebrate them as a whole.
Mater's, of course, was the original, and Alien Swirling Saucers gets no credit for that. However, the ride system is just such a simple but perfect thrill, porting it to other parks is a natural conclusion; you can honestly fit it just about anywhere with any theme. The hilarity of the junkyard transfer just perfectly to the claw game. As well, it fits distinct need that Disney's Hollywood Studios lacked, that we have established is important for a well-rounded park: that flat ride C ticket.
While the open junkyard setting for Mater's does fit its theme perfectly, Saucers adds some unique elements with its vibrant lights and colors, and props around the turntables. Where Jamboree has hilarious hoedown music, Alien opts instead for catchy synth jazz of Toy Story themes. Oh, and also the ever-important seasonal Christmas music.
While A. S. S. is unironically one of my favorite rides in the park, and should be on everyone's must-do list (wait times willing) on a Studios day, it sits here in a way as a representative of an entire under-appreciated genre. It sits atop the shoulders of tiny giants, and here it pays homage to them all with its inclusion.
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